Modern Day Proverbs...
1. If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you.
2. A day without sunshine is like, night.
3. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, and then used against you.
4. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
5. I feel like I’m diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
6. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?
7. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
8. Nothing is foolproof to a talented fool.
9. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
10. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
11. Borrow money from a pessimist -they don't expect it back.
12. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
13. I intend to live forever -so far so good.
14. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
15. Mind like a steel trap -rusty and illegal in 37 states.
16. Quantum mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.
17. Support bacteria -they're the only culture some people have.
18. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane and going the wrong way.
19. For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.
20. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
21. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
22. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
23. 23. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
24. Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
25. No one is listening until you make a mistake.